whats wrong with hermione
by acidredshadow
Summary: hermione is a bit suicidal and she finds out stuff in and out of school that might push her over the edge or will the new guy in her life do it for her.
1. leaving for hogwarts

disclaimer- I do own them I bought everyone for 20 dollars, it was an extra 7 for draco though, and they gave me lucius they just wanted to get rid of him. No kidding I no own.  
  
Summary-hermoine is a bit suicidal and when she finds out about some stuff about her self In and out of school will they push her over the edge or will the new guy in her life.  
  
this is my first Harry potter fic and i want to know what you think okay good or bad review i like making changes if needed okay. thanx  
  
With no further ado chapter one.  
  
chapter 1- leaving for hogwarts  
  
  
  
"get your ass down her now, your mother wants to talk to you" hermiones stepfather yelled up the stairs  
  
"I'll be down in a minute" she yelled back  
  
She out her last book into her trunk and locked it shut. She sat down on her bed and took a switch blade out of her back pocket. she pulled up her pant leg and flipped the knife open and slid it across her leg. She watched the blood spill out of the cut and down her leg, running over old scabs and scars.  
  
"get your ass down here now" her stepfather yelled again.  
  
"I'm coming" she screamed.  
  
She dapped the blood off her leg and pulled her pant leg down again she shut the knife and put it in her back pocket where she almost always kept it.  
  
She walked down the stairs to see her mother and stepfather talking in hushed voices. When her Mom saw her, she asked stepfather to go put her stuff into her car. her Mom patter the seat next to her on the couch signaling hermoine to come site down.  
  
"hermoine, i decided i wanted to tell you the truth about something. i want to tell you know because of your fathers suspisus death and the twins on the way and you leaving for hogwarts i just thought it was the right time" her mother continued. "hunny you're adopted, we adopted you when you were a couple weeks old, you had been with the adoption agency for awhile, say something" she said when she saw hermione just sitting there with a blank stare on her face.  
  
her stepfather walked in "your stuffs in your car" he told her  
  
"hunny" her Mom said touching her arm.  
  
"Don't touch me" she said and got up fast "bye" she said and ran out of the house to her car and left.  
  
She arrived at the train station an hour and a half before she should be. She walked onto the train leaving her stuff to be put into her cart.  
  
she walked into one of the carts, she knew as the one her, Harry and Ron always shared, she smiled a small smile at the memories she had of them. she wouldn't be sitting with them this year, she would be sitting with one of the other prefects. then she thought that was a good thing, she didn't want anyone accidentally getting a look at the cuts and scars on her body. without realizing it a tear slipped down her cheek, she wiped it away angrily, she hated crying it showed weakness, and she wasn't weak.  
  
As she stood there she thought of some of her other friends that she had meet during the summer at camp, she hadn't seen them for a while.  
  
during the first couple weeks of summer vacation she went to a wizarding camp in America. the camp taught a lot of things she was already learning at hogwarts, but when she was there she took flying classes. toward the end of July of camp was ending they had a contest for everyone to compete in, the winner won a firebolt and 100 galleons. sense she was only there for the first time she was not as good as some of the other people who had been going for years, but when she got in the air, she blew them away and won first place. on the last day before they left, they counselors asked them to get into groups by what school the went too. sense hermione mostly kept to herself, she thought she was the only one from hogwarts. when she was walking to go sit where the hogwarts students were supposed to sit, her new fire bolt in hand, she saw that she wasn't the only one from hogwarts, but she was the only one from gryffindor house all the rest were from slytherin.  
  
:: this is going to be hell:: she thought and went and sat at the table.  
  
she saw that it was the slytherin quidditch team, well all except malfoy, the seeker and new captain.  
  
"so where's your friend malfoy" hermione said "didn't think he would miss the chance to make fun of a mudblood like me, so where is he the little boys room" seh laughed  
  
"no actually, he wasn't able to come, his family went to Australia this summer, although i don't think he could bother you to much, you could probably beat him on a broom" said the keeper she knew as cassandra  
  
"yeah, we saw you in the compition, you were wicked good" said one of the beaters, Jamie.  
  
"thanks i think, i don't usually have civil convo's with you ahh.. slytherins" hermione said  
  
"Yeah, well, were bored and you seem cool enough" said the other beater, Jason, Jamie's twin brother.  
  
"so sense were leaving tomorrow we were goign to have a practice tonight on the quidittch field, maybe you want to join us for a bit take draco's spot, be our seeker." Cassandra asked  
  
to hermiones own surprise she said yes, she went out and practiced with them for a couple hours, when they finally stopped, hermione was happier then she had been in a long time.  
  
"that was fun" she said catching her breath  
  
"Yeah your pretty good, when were in school when draco isn't around you wanna practice with us" Cassandra asked.  
  
Hermione who they all called Mia now, shook her head yes and gave them each a hug before the each went there own ways to finish packing to go home tomorrow.  
  
She had become friends with six members of slytherin house and she knew if her other friends found out they would hate her but she didn't care.  
  
hermione smiled at the thoughts, then realized that she was still standing in the doorway of the cart. then she also realized she had to go to the bathroom. she walked down the hall to the bathroom and well went and when she stood up and looked into the mirror she pulled up her shirt and looked at some of the cuts on her stomach. she ran a hand over some of them and felt the sting of pain a few that wernt all the way healed yet. She walked out and looked at her watch she still had an hour. she decided to go and see which prefect she would be staying with.  
  
When she got to the prefect cart she saw that the sign on the door said she would be sharing it with the slytherin prefect.  
  
"Great" she mumbled and walked in and saw that the prefect was already there.  
  
"oh no, what are you doing here, you are not the slytherin prefect" she yelled  
  
"Oh yes, I'm sitting, and yes I am" he said calmly.  
  
"Great, just my luck, I get to spend my trip to hogwarts with a malfoy." she groaned sitting in the seat across from him and as far away from him as possible.  
  
"you think i want to spend it with a mudblood granger." he snarled  
  
"I'm not..." she stopped she didn't want him to know  
  
"your not what" he said  
  
"nothing, its none of your business" she said "so how was Australia"  
  
"how do you know i went there" he said, sitting up from his slouching position fast  
  
  
  
"a little birdie told me" she laughed  
  
"fine" he mumbled  
  
"What the hell is that" she said pointing to the bruisish type thing on his neck. "its a hickey aint it" she said rolling her eyes.  
  
He didn't answer.  
  
::never can keep that stupid Parkinson's off him can he:: she thought  
  
::let her think what ever the hell she wants, i dont give a damn:; he thought :: as long as she doesn't know its a bruise, or how or who i got it from she can believe what ever she what ever the fuck she wants:: he thought  
  
"so mudblood saw them loading your stuff, you got a fire bolt why, you cant fly" he said  
  
"As a matter of fact I can" she said looking out the window, she saw that some people were starting arrive.  
  
"yeah right, stupid little mudbloods like yourself can't fly even if you are in your sixth year you would still fall on you ass trying to get into the air" he laughed  
  
that had hurt. she kept her mouth shut and looked around. she saw that they had put her bag that contained her robes, CD player, and other stuff. she pulled out her robes and pulled them on over her clothes closing it so malfoy couldn't see her arms. she pulled out her knife from her back pocket and opened it. she slid it across her arm then put the knife back away. she felt the familiar stingof pain and smiled.  
  
"what are you smiling at" malfoy sneered  
  
"no reason" she said ignoring him.  
  
She felt the blood run down her the side of her arm and a drop land on her leg. Now she was glad she had worn black jeans. she pulled out a tissue and dapped the blood and pulled her robes apart a little, she had on a long sleeved shirt, so she pulled the sleeves down and took the robes off, she was to hot in them.  
  
"What are you staring at malfoy" she asked when she saw him staring at her.  
  
"nothing" he blinked and looked away  
  
:: wonder how she go those cuts on her wrist:: he thought rubbing the skin on his wrist feeling some of the scars there :: she wouldn't she's to happy, a person :: he thought and looked at her again, she had on head phones and her eyes were closed and her head was leaned back against the seat exposing her neck and tattoo over her heart, really lost in the music: her cat probably did it, damn she looks cute, ahh don't think that you hate her:: he scolded him self. He shock his head a few strands of hair falling in his face. Sense he didn't where his hair slicked back anymore it just fell in his face most of time.  
  
Hermione had cracked her eyes to see malfoy staring at her, he saw her open her eyes and turned away fast.  
  
::What's with him:: she thought and looked out the window, she saw Harry and the weasleys walk on to the platform. she smiled and took off her head phones and got off the train to go say hi to them, malfoy staring at her retreating back.  
  
"hey" she waved to them and ran over, she gave each of them a hug.  
  
"how are you guys" she asked  
  
"good" Harry and Ron said together  
  
Hermione noticed that both Ron and Harry had both grow a lot over the summer and were both a couple inches taller then her and Harry had gotten contacts.  
  
"You look good to hermie" Ron said looking at the tattoo on her chest.  
  
"One my don't call me hermie you know I hate that and two my face is up here" she said and Ron looked up into her eyes bright red.  
  
"Sorry, but where and when did you get that" he asked referring to the tattoo.  
  
"with some friends during the summer" she said  
  
Besides the tattoo, which was a half sun and moon over her heart, she had grow too. She was now 5'6 she had straight hair, and had filled out a little and was now wearing a c cup.  
  
"you guys look good too" she said "I'm prefect this year" she said  
  
"great" Ron said  
  
"good for you, you deserve it" Harry said  
  
"yeah, but you'll never guess who i have to share a cart with" she said  
  
"who" the two boys said together  
  
"malfoy" she sighed "he's the slytherin prefect"  
  
"that sux" Ron said and she nodded  
  
"so who did you go and get that tattoo with" Harry asked  
  
"i told you some friends" she said nervously. playing with the hem of her shirt  
  
"hermione, we know all your friends and none of them would get a tattoo" Harry said  
  
"I went with my friend cassie sheesh okay" she said. cassie is what hermione called Cassandra.  
  
"does she go to hogwarts" ran asked, hermione shook her head yes. "what house, cause we don't have a cassie in ours" he said  
  
"oh um well she's in" hermione got interupted  
  
"Yo, granger, dumbledore wants to see us" draco called from the cart.  
  
"coming bye guys" she said and ran to the cart slamming to door behind her in relief. "where's dumbledore" she aksed  
  
"lied, looked like you could use a save, but your gonna have to pay me back" he said  
  
"Thanks I think" she said and sat down in her seat.  
  
"whatever" he said  
  
"All passengers please board the train, we will be leaving in 3 minutes" a man said over the intercom.  
  
Those three minutes past fast and the train started to move.  
  
Malfoy slid down until he was right across from hermione.  
  
"why are you there" she asked  
  
"wanted to look out the window, don't get excited" he said  
  
"Whatever" she said and put her head phones on.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
It doesn't matter what I want it doesn't matter what I need it doesn't matter if I cry don't matter if I bleed you've been on a road don't know where it goes or where it leads...  
  
  
  
  
  
Malfoy stretched and put his legs straight brushing hermiones and staying there, touching they both noticed but didn't say anything.  
  
Hermione went back to her music and fell asleep a few verses after the new song started.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
know all about, about your reputation and now its bound to be a heart break situation  
  
  
  
~*~*~*~*  
  
that's the first chapter i hope you liked it let me know  
  
the songs that were in it were-  
  
It doesn't matter - by: Alison krauss & union staion  
  
the right kind of wrong- by: Leann rimes 


	2. threats and deals

Brokenflower- thanks for telling me like honesty, um what's a beta reader.  
  
Dracoluver- thanks for being brutally honest, I hate people sugar coating it when they don't like something, I hope for more reviews from you.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
chapter 2- threats and deals  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
"Hermione wake up" Draco said shaking her lightly.  
  
Her eyes fluttered open  
  
"Did you just call me by my first name, malfoy" she asked yawning  
  
"no" he lied and sat back down "we will be there soon, you need to get you school clothes on" he told her  
  
He had changed while she was sleeping.  
  
"could ya go outside" she asked  
  
"Yeah sure" he said and walked outside and leaned his back to the door.  
  
Hermione stood up and yawned and a blanket fell of her.  
  
"Who put that on me" she asked her self then shrugged  
  
She pulled her skirt and shirt from her bag and put them on. Sense the school was allowing 6th and 7th years to dress how they wanted under there robes, she did.  
  
She had on a red and black plaid skirt, a black tank top with black arm warms that went up to her elbows, showing the only parts of her arms that weren't all scratched up and she had on black lace up knee high boots, her whole outfit was from a muggle store, hot topic ^good store^.  
  
She pulled her school robes on over the outfit and pinned on her prefect badge to it, and looked down at herself and double checked that you couldn't see any cuts. you could see one small one on her left arm but she could say that was a cat scratch. she pulled her knife from her jeans and put it in the pocket of her skirt. She checked one more time and started to put her stuff back in her bag.  
  
**************************  
  
"So you're sharing a cart with Mione', What'd she do kick you out" Ron said as he and Harry walked over to malfoy.  
  
  
  
"Yeah and no" he said rudely.  
  
"hmm, then why you out here" Harry said  
  
"She's changing" draco glared  
  
"Not with out a fight from you about leaving i bet, look get this straight, you hurt Hermione in anyway, i swear we will hurt you malfoy" Harry said  
  
"Why in the hell would i want to hurt your stupid little mudblood bitch friend" draco yelled at them  
  
"to get your way, but I'm sure your dad could always get you what you needed" Harry spat  
  
"That's it potter" draco said and raised his fist to punch Harry  
  
**********  
  
Hermione heard the argument and stepped out to see Dracos fist colliding with Harry's shoulder. Harry raised his fist to punch malfoy, but hermione stepped in to try to stop him and got herself punched in the jaw. She grabbed her jaw and stared at the three boys for a second before running off to the bathroom  
  
She slammed the door and locked it. She threw of her robes and pulled off her arm warmers and threw them to the heap of robes on the floor. she pulled out her knife from her back pocket and flipped it open, then slid it across her arm four times. She cleaned the knife and put it back in her pocket.  
  
she leaned on the sink and looked in the mirror, she was going to have a big bruise, it was already starting to form, but what caught her attention were the tears in her eyes and on her cheeks, she hadn't even noticed she was crying, and again like before she wiped them away viciously she looked at her arm, the blood was starting to stop but it covered a good portion of her arm all way down to her finger tips. She grabbed a napkin and got it went before wiping the blood off. she pulled everything back on and unlocked the door and walked out. She walked out and back to the cart. malfoy was sitting, staring out the window, rubbing the sleeve of his arm when she walked in.  
  
::please don't notice:: he thought  
  
Hermione finished putting her stuff away and had not noticed that draco had got up and was standing behind her.  
  
"Let me see" he said making her jump.  
  
"what" she said irritated  
  
"let me see, i know its going to bruise." he said  
  
"no" she said and turned away from him  
  
"why"  
  
"don't trust you" she said  
  
He grabbed her arm and turned her around. She gasped, his wand was on her jaw where it was bruising. he murmured something and the stinging went away. He pulled his wand back and sat back down.  
  
Hermione grabbed her mini mirror and held it up, the bruise was gone.  
  
"How, why did you do that" she asked touching her jaw.  
  
"i did it with a spell duh," he said "and over the last two years i have learned to take responsibility for what i have done, and that was partly my fault, but don't think it changes anything, were not gonna be buddy, buddy" he siad  
  
"thanks and good i don't want to be your friend, i hate every member in your house" she lied  
  
"yeah well my friends are way more powerful then yours" he said  
  
"Harry could kick your ass any day and so could i and you know it" she said  
  
"i.." he was cut off  
  
"we have arrived, please proceed to leaving the train" the conductor said  
  
Hermione got out fast.  
  
"First years follow me, prefects and heads that way" hermione and draco heard and saw Hagrid say.  
  
"Get away from me" she said to malfoy and walked to the boat.  
  
Unfortunately to her the other three prefects got in too.  
  
::great:: she thought  
  
She zoned out, the ride to hogwarts trying to figure out places she could go if she got to mad or upset, she finally decided on a number of places she new no one went, mainly the astronomy tower during the day and the dark forest at night, she really didn't care if something attacked her.  
  
Little did she know malfoy was thinking the same thing, only he had been going to those two spots for the last year.  
  
"All a foot" the rower said snapping both hermione and draco out of there thoughts.  
  
They all got out of the boat and walked to the school and into the great hall sitting with there friends.  
  
"look, hermione I'm sorry about earlier" Harry said "it was aimed at malfoy not you please forgive me" he said  
  
"its okay" she said "i know it was an accident" she said "besides the bruise was an easy cover up" she lied showing them her jaw "no harm done"  
  
"good" Ron said  
  
Everyone was in there seats and they heard hagrid tell professor McGonagell that the first years were ready.  
  
Dumbledore stood up.  
  
"before we bring in the first years, i would like to introduce our new prefects and head boy and girl" he said. he named everyone and draco and hermione were last. "the slytherin prefect draco malfoy" every slytherin clapped everyone else groaned "and for gryffindor hermione granger" he said and every one but slytherin cheered as she walked up to sit next to hagrid, on her other side would be professor McGonagell, when she was done with the sorting hat.  
  
The first years came in and the house sorting ceremony went as usual.  
  
Dumbledore went on with his usual speech, but added something at the end. "we will be having four quidditich teams visiting," everyone started to cheer "quite down, they are from a school in America built by the same four people who built hogwarts, they will be arriving in march, but so i have heard very excited about coming, and from what i have seen can there gryffindor house seeker could rival our own mister potter" he said "but enough of that, that feast begin"  
  
Hermione giggled when she saw the all the first years gasp when the food appeared, and when Ron's eyes lit up as usual.  
  
The feast was done and over in a while and Dumbledore stood again, but not before telling the prefects to go and stand at the end of the tables.  
  
"The prefects will lead the first years to there rooms and then report back here to be show your own rooms."  
  
"Okay follow me" hermione said and started walking, the first years following close behind, looking at the scenery as the went by.  
  
Hermione stopped at the fat ladies picture.  
  
"hello" hermione said  
  
"hello dear, password please" the lady said  
  
"just a second, this is the entrance to our common room, this years password is gumdrop, but sometime changes around the middle of the year, please note not to forget that" she said and walked inside, when she saw that all the first years were inside she continued. "this is our common room, boys dorms are to the left, girls dorm to the right, lights out by ten for anyone fourth year and below, midnight for fifth and up, if there aren't any questions I'll be on my way" she said and one girl raised her hand shyly.  
  
"What if we forget the password, should we right it down" she asked.  
  
hermione smiled "your Neville's cousin right" the little girl nodded yes. "no, I'm sorry you can't write down the password. if you really want to know ask your cousin why you can't, it turned to be a very scary experience for some" she said "if that is all i will be on my way" she said and walked out and back to the great hall to see everyone there already. She giggled nervously.  
  
All the teachers were talking so she went to talk to the ravenclaw prefect, Stanton, but malfoy got to her first.  
  
"so why you so late granger" he asked rudely  
  
"Yeah I thought you would be the first back" Jessie the hufflepuff prefect stated.  
  
Hermione turned away from draco to face the other two "you know Neville right" she asked, they nodded. "well his younger cousin wanted to know why she could not write down the password, in case she forgot. I had to tell her to go ask Neville why" she said with a laugh.  
  
"Just as stupid as her cousin I bet" malfoy said obviously not in a good mood.  
  
"At least I have friends who can put a sentence together" she said referring to crabb and goyle, dracos dump ass friends.  
  
"there..." he was cut of again by professor Lego, who was the new dada (defense against the dark arts) teacher. he showed them to there rooms. the door way was behind a picture of the four original owners of hogwarts. "the pass word is pixie" he said and left. hermione could not help but think he was a bit jumpy, he was an auror, and was her to help keep the school a little more safe sense voldemort was still at large, it had taken a long talk between fudge and Dumbledore to get him to agree to letting Mr. Lego on school grounds.  
  
they all walked inside and looked around. the common room was huge at least three times the size as the other common rooms and was decorated tastefully with all the house colors so they did not clash. they all went into there own rooms, hermione loved her room, it was bigger that the room she had, had to share in the tower, and there was a doorway behind a long piece of fabric with the gryffindor crest on it that lead straight to the tower.  
  
::so that's how percy got there that fast:: she thought  
  
the only problem she had was that she had to share a room with the other for prefects. hermione grabbed her bathrobe and toiletries and went to get a shower, unfortunalty she found she wasn't the only one with the idea, Stanton and draco were both inline so hermione just went and stood at the end next to draco, his back turned to her.  
  
"great, fantastic" seh said to herself  
  
"what did you say" draco said turning around  
  
"nothing" she said and her turned back around.  
  
Jessie walked out and Stanton walked in leaving only her and draco.  
  
"look, i want to have a somewhat civil year, and the professors expect us to be set an example to younger students, so do you think we could try to be nice to each other when were in the common room" she said "i mean i don't want to be friends, just to act a little civil, in other words, less name calling and shouting, and threats" she said  
  
"fine" he said "but dont expect it all the time"  
  
"good enough for me" she said "I'm gonna take my shower tomorrow" she said and left.  
  
when she got to her room she put on her pajamas and pulled a few thinks out from her trunk. she put her knife on her bedside table along with her journal. she sat down on the bed and pulled the journal into her lap and wrote out a passage about what she had down today.  
  
....i think i have feelings for someone i shouldn't....  
  
after she had finished writing she turned back to and earlier passage that held a poem she had written awhile ago.  
  
~*~*~**~*~*~*~*~~**~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
  
  
  
  
forever lost in a corner  
  
By: hermione granger  
  
she sits in her room, alone in a corner. She watches her world go, by realizing feelings she never had and contemplating her life. She cries for no reason, as a tear slides down she remembers her friends have never seen her cry, shed a tear, or weep. She stands to look upon her room. She walks over to a shelf and picks up a box and takes it back to her corner. She thinks this will happen before they would ever think and how no one would be able to stop her. From the box she takes a book, a dagger, and a note. She opens the book and looks on a poem she wrote so long ago, realizing that, that poem describes her life now. She sits the dagger down beside her and picks up the note. The note she had written only a day ago, it told her family of what she felt and what she knew they would feel for not paying attention and understanding her. She put the letter in an envelope and sat down on the floor beside her so they would be able to see it was there. She picks up one more thing from the box a simple pen is all. She takes in her hand and begins to write on her wall. you should have cared more' were the words that were left as the pen fell to the ground next to her. No one would be home for a while, she had made sure that was true. Her Mom at work till three when it was only two. A younger sister at a friends, hopefully to the very end. The person she called a father was no where near, even though she thought, she knew, he wouldn't care. She took the dagger in her hand and stared at her reflection in the blade. She holds the dagger to her wrist and cuts to cuts, on across, one down. She watches the blood spill from the marks and began to think of what her life had become. Her life was great until high school, she had great friends who were now gone, the memories she had left of them left back in that building, that place, her old school. The family she loved screaming and yelling almost never stopping. She started a new school liking most people she meet, but most did not like her. She sat in the back of every class keeping to herself, the only thing she had going for her was her so small part of the school paper writing poetry and short stories. As her memories ran across her mind her vision began to fade. Her head felt light, her limps were heavy, and she felt like she couldn't even stay sitting. Her arms fall from her lap where they had been sitting and she hears a faint sound, the dagger falling to the ground. Her breath was short and she was almost dead. 'this is my end' was her last thought, and that it was. Her breath is no more, her life is over, her soul is gone, foreverlost in that one corner. Some time later her mother and sister came home and her Mom yelled her name and got no response. Her younger sister walked into her room and a scream escaped her lips as she saw her sister limp on the floor dead. As the Mom heard the scream she ran to see what had happened, when she saw her oldest daughter on the floor a hand flew to her lips to keep from screaming as well. She pulled her youngest daughter from the room and went to call the cops, when she was done with that she called the father, he needed to know. An hour later the police and coroner were gone claiming it was a suicide, the police had found the note and gave e it to the family, the dad read it out loud and they all began to cry again. Calls were made letters were sent her funeral was in a week. Family, friends and even enemies they all did attend. Some spoke, most cried till the very end wishing they could have stopped her but they never did. At the reception almost no one spoke but sat filled with sadness, all realizing but mostly her Mom and dad that they should have cared more and paid attention to the women she was becoming because then they might still have her in there lives.  
  
~*~*~*~**~~*~**~*~*~*~*~  
  
After that she closed her book and set it on her nightstand, waved her wand to turn off all lights and laid down her CD player playing softly in the background.  
  
  
  
~~enemys forever, hatred always between us, but slowly were becoming friend~~  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
did ya like please review and tell me. thanx.  
  
the poem is written by me and if you want can put up a review for it it has its own link, just go to my profle to find if you want to.  
  
if you want to be told when this story is updated just tell me in your review and i will send you an email when it is 


	3. quidditch robes

Chapter 3- quidditch robes  
  
  
  
  
  
Draco sat in his room, up for the last hour and it was only 5 am. He put some of his clothes away in his closet, trying to figure out what to wear. At the moment all he had on was a white beater and boxers with stars al over them. He walked past his mirror and stopped, he looked at his reflection, at his arms and legs, and they were scratched up a lot.  
  
He sighed ::why the hell am I so fucked up:: he thought  
  
He pulled on black pants and a long sleeved shirt and went and sat in the common room. No one would be awake for awhile.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Hermione woke up to her cat nudging her head with his own fuzzy one.  
  
"I'm up boy" she said and sat up. She put him on her lap and scratched his back for a few minutes before getting out of bed. She looked at the clock it was only a bit after 5 but she got up anyway.  
  
She grabbed her toiletries and went to the bathroom. She put her stuff down and turned on the shower, putting on really hot. She got in and washed her hair, and then just stood there a few minutes letting the water run down her naked body. When it hit a few cuts I stung a lot, but Hermione just smiled at the pain, she liked it. She got out and pulled a bathrobe around herself. She dried and straightened her hair with a charm, glad she didn't have to do it the muggle way anymore it took to long. She put on her make up, which consisted of only a black eyeliner and shadow, with that done she went back to her room.  
  
Glade that each of the prefects rooms were sound proof she blasted her stereo as she got dressed  
  
Someone tell me why I do the things That I don't wanna do When you're around me I'm somebody else Someone tell me why I act like a fool When things don't go my way When you're around me I'm somebody else  
  
She pulled on her under wear and bra and pulled on black and red bondage pants and a black sleeveless top with arm warmers. She pulled on black doc martins and then finally her school robes. She looked at her clock it was only a little after 6, so she walked over turned off her stereo and grabbed her books and bag and walked out to the common room. When she got there she saw Draco sitting on the couch reading a magazine.  
  
"Why do we always run into each other" she said sitting down on the opposite couch.  
  
"I don't know Hermione" he said  
  
"Why did you call me by my first name" she asked  
  
"Agreement last night remembers" he said not looking up at her.  
  
"Oh yeah forgot sorry" she said "what ya look-in at"  
  
"Magazine" was all he said  
  
"Obviously, what kind" she put her books on the table.  
  
"Knife magazine, thinking of getting a new one"  
  
"Let me see" she got up and walked over to the other couch sitting down beside him with a good amount of space between them. "I can't see"  
  
"Then sit closer" he said  
  
"Ahh no I'm fine"  
  
He put his arm around her waist and pulled her closer. She moved back. He did it again and brushed over a few cuts making her jump a little.  
  
:: What the:: he thought  
  
"You move back again and next time I'll pull you onto my lap" he joked  
  
:: Hmm I would like that. Ahh stop you hate mud bloods:: he scolded himself  
  
"Scary thought I'll stay here" she3 said and grabbed one side so each of them was holding half. There were tons of knife magical and muggle.  
  
"I want that one" she said pointing to a magical one that cleaned it self and it was a switch blade like the one she already had. It had a rose one side of the handle and you get your name put on the other.  
  
"Which one" Draco asked  
  
She pointed. "That one" then she saw the cost "epp 75 galleons, guess I'm not getting in it"  
  
"Why do you want a knife anyway" he asked suspiosly  
  
"Um just like it is all" she said  
  
"Okay then" he said and looked at his watch, it was already 7 "I'm going to get my friends, bye granger" he said and left.  
  
"Bye malfoy" she sneered and grabbed her books and went to go meet Ron and Harry.  
  
"Hello boy's" she said walking up behind them in the hall  
  
"Hey" they said in unison  
  
"What in the world are you wearing" Ron said  
  
"Clothes, this is how I like to dress, get use to it" she said "wanna go eat"  
  
"Yeah" they said  
  
The three of them walked to the great hall and seated themselves as usual.  
  
"Say you never told us which house Cassie was in" Harry said  
  
"Oh um, I'll tell you later, the mails here" she said and as she did hundreds of owls came swooping in.  
  
Harry got a letter from Sirius as usual and Ron had on from his parents, Hermione got her issue of the daily prophet and a letter from her so called mother.  
  
"Stay" she told the owl that had dropped off the letter, she gave the bird a piece of toast wondering how her mom knew how to owl, then proceeded to read the letter.  
  
Hermione-  
  
Hunny, we love you a lot and I would really like to speak with you, if you don't want to I completely understand but remember we always love you.  
  
-mom  
  
  
  
Hermione sighed, she knew her step father didn't love her. She leaned down and grabbed a quill and ink from her bag.  
  
Mother-  
  
You lied to me for 16 year of my life and that is not an easy thing to forgive. I know you love me and I would like to talk too, but I just need time. By the way who are my real parents.  
  
-Hermione.  
  
  
  
Hermione tied the parchment to the owls' leg and it flew away.  
  
~~~~~~~~  
  
On the other side of the room Draco had receive a letter from his father.  
  
Draco-  
  
As you know son I am a death eater and my lord, lord voldemort is rising in power again and we need help. Send me a letter to me by the end of November telling what your answer it. It better be a yes, because you know that I can be a lot worse them lord voldemort if needed.  
  
Yours truly, Lucius  
  
  
  
::crap:: Draco thought  
  
He leaned over to Cassandra.  
  
"Cassandra practice is still on for to day but I will not be attending, and don't ask why okay. I will be in practice next time." He said and got up and left the great hall.  
  
~~~~~~~~  
  
Hermione got up and walked to get a book she left in her room, but as she was walking someone pulled her into the girl's bathroom. The first person, so to speak, she saw was mertal.  
  
"Hello mertal, why did you pull me in here" she said  
  
"I didn't those nasty snakes did" she pointed to two girls by the mirrors.  
  
"Jamie, Cassie" Hermione squealed and hugged each of them. "How are you"  
  
"Good, yourself" Jamie said  
  
"Fine" Hermione said "why did you guys pull me in here"  
  
"Well draco's being odd and not coming to practice to day so we were wondering if you wanted to come and practice with us" Cassie said  
  
"Of course" she said "what time"  
  
"During free period after lunch" Jamie said  
  
The bell rang  
  
"I got to go, I'll see you later" she said and left with a wave good bye.  
  
She ran to the dungeons, her first class of the day was double potions with slytherin.  
  
::fantastic two hours with lots of people I hate, snape, crabb, goyle, malfoy:: she thought ::well malfoy okay, he's kind of cute, what are you thinking you twit he is the enemy:: she mentally slapped herself  
  
She took her seat right next to Harry and Ron, praying snape didn't notice her, he did.  
  
"Ms. Granger why are you late" he said  
  
"I had to go to the bathroom" she half lied  
  
"5 points from Gryffindor for your class mates' tardiness" he said and turned to walk back up to the front of the class.  
  
"Why are you so mean to us" she said  
  
"What" he said turning around, a couple people let out small laughs.  
  
"you heard me" she said "why are you so mean, were you like beat up by Gryffindor 7th years when you were a 1st year or something, cause I can really see that happening, so what is your dilemma, why do you hate us so much" she finished ignoring the pleas from the two boys sitting next to her to stop.  
  
"Well Ms. Granger, that would be none of your business" he sad and walked back up to the front of the class again. "And 50 points from Gryffindor for you little out burst"  
  
Hermione just shrugged and leaned back in her chair.  
  
"Could I possible start my class now" he said rudely  
  
"Be my guest" she said and everyone laughed.  
  
"5 more points from Gryffindor, now turn to 293 in your books and read till 370, we will be doing these potions tomorrow" at that he sat down at his desk scowling at a grinning Hermione.  
  
At the end of class Hermione walked out ignoring everyone until her two guy friends caught up with her.  
  
"Why did you get 60 points taken from our house, why" Harry said  
  
"I'm tired of always getting points taken away for stupid shit, so if there going to get taken its going to be for something good, and besides I wan tot know why snape is always so mad at us" she said "where you going next"  
  
"Divination" they both groaned.  
  
"I have arithmacy, so I'll see you guys at lunch" she said and left walking in the opposite direction then the boys. She turned around "Harry" he turned to look at her. "Don't forget to tell me how you are going to die this year okay" she called.  
  
He laughed, nodded and waved goodbye then left.  
  
Arithmicy went as usual, boring. Once that class was over she put her stuff in her bag and walked to the great hall for lunch.  
  
"So how are you dying this year" she asked sitting in a seat at the Gryffindor table instead of at the head table with the other prefects.  
  
"Well according to the tarot cards, I won't be hurt physically for awhile, but I will be emotionally. I think her sad a friend would deceive me" he said rolling his eyes.  
  
"She said that about me too, it aint gonna happen, she is nuts" Ron said and the three of them laughed.  
  
Hermione ate a seedless orange and a glass of water while she watched the two boys pug out. She looked at her watch it was 15 minutes till she had to meet the others.  
  
"I have to go you guys" she said getting up to leave  
  
"Going to the library" Harry stated more then asked  
  
"Err yeah" she lied "I'll see you in class later" she said and left headed for outside.  
  
"Mia good to see ya" Jason said giving her a hug a she walked up to the group.  
  
"Hey, lets party" she said and got on her fire bolt and took off.  
  
"I'm with her" faith, a chaser, said  
  
They all got in the air and Cassandra let out the balls then quickly got to her position as keeper.  
  
After they had practiced until 20 mins before there next classes started they finally grounded and put the balls away. Hermione having caught the snitch, 16 times.  
  
"Okay, mia close your eyes, we have a surprise for you" another chaser Leo said.  
  
"What are you gonna put a snake on me" she said putting on her robes.  
  
"Would we do that" the last chase Stephan said.  
  
"Yes"  
  
"Just close em okay" Cassie said.  
  
"Fine" she said and closed her eyes reluctantly  
  
"okay, well its gonna get cold soon and you can't fly without robes, and the school robes are to bulky and well we got you this, put your hands out" Cassie said and took her broom and replaced it with a long wooden box. "Open up"  
  
Hermione opened her eyes and saw the box in her hands, her name carved in to the lid.  
  
"It was Jamie's idea" Jason said putting an arm around his sister's shoulders.  
  
Hermione sat it on the ground and opened it inside were a set of quidditch robes for slytherin house. And stuff to clean her broom. She pulled out the outer part of the robes and slid it on.  
  
"Thanks" she said giving each of them a hug.  
  
"And there's enough room in there for your fire bolt" Jamie said  
  
"Thank you its sweet" mia said  
  
They all said there good byes and went to get cleaned up before class. Hermione put the box on the floor next to her dress and put her broom in it. She did a refresh spell and looked at herself in the mirror. She smiled a small smile, thinking of the fun she had just had.  
  
She grabbed her books and headed towards transfiguration class. Professor McGonagall was great, she explained that this year they would be learning how to turn a human into something, everyone was happy. At the end of class Hermione went up to talk to her professor.  
  
"Professor, I was wondering if prophase in free time you could give me extra lessons" she asked  
  
"About what, you are the top student in this class ms granger."  
  
About hoe to turn my self into and animal to become and animagus" Hermione explained  
  
"ms. Granger it takes a great deal of work to be able to shape shift with out a wand, it will take up a good part of your free time" the professor said "it takes a great deal of energy to you have to be very strong"  
  
"I understand or I would not have asked"  
  
"Well, I suppose we will meet every Friday and Saturday nights at 8 and Wednesdays at 7 is that good"  
  
"Great, thank you" hermione said happily and turned to leave.  
  
Hermione dropped her stuff in her room and walked down to the great hall for dinner. She sat in her usual seat, next to Harry across from Ron.  
  
"So where were you during free period" Ron asked  
  
" Why do you ask"  
  
"Wondering" Harry said  
  
"I was in the library you already knew that" she said taking a bit of a roll.  
  
"Minoe' we went to the library you weren't there" Harry said  
  
"Oh um, that's because I was in the restricted section, I got a note from McGonagall because I am doing research on animagus" she lied again  
  
"Oh okay" Ron said and went on with eating his dinner.  
  
After dinner they each went there separate ways to there dorms. Hermione walked into her and saw Draco sitting on the couch reading a book.  
  
"So why weren't you at quidditch practice" she said and regretted it the moment she realized she said it.  
  
"How do you know I wasn't there" he said looking up at her.  
  
"Oh I was bored so I went to watch you and you weren't there is all" she said the excuse.  
  
"Oh um, I was reading, I really needed to look up something" he said  
  
"Well good for you, night" she said and turned to go to her room.  
  
"Night" she heard him say to her retreating back.  
  
She went to her room and stripped down putting on her pj's which consisted of under where and a black top. She took a blanket out of her chest and put it over the wooden bow the team had given her and her lie down and fell asleep.  
  
I hate to talk like this I hate to act as if there's something wrong But I can't say I have this dream at night almost every night I've been dreaming it forever.  
  
  
  
~~~~~  
  
"Do you think what Ginny said is true, do you think that Hermione was lying to us" Ron asked Harry  
  
"I honestly don't know Ron, I guess we'll just have to wait and see, but she has been acting different this year so who knows" Harry said. "Its late lets go to bed"  
  
Ron nodded and the two boys walked up the steps to there dorms and soon after fell asleep.  
  
  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Okay guys I have given this thought and sense quidditch is semi important part in this fic I am giving you the team list.  
  
Slytherin  
  
Seeker- Draco malfoy - prefect - captain  
  
Beater- Jamie Anderson  
  
Beater- Jason Anderson  
  
Chaser- faith maradise  
  
Chaser- Leo starling  
  
Chaser- Stephen haas  
  
Keeper- Cassandra (Cassie) keys  
  
Gryffindor  
  
Seeker- Harry potter - captain  
  
Beater- Ron weasly  
  
Beater- scarlet fefermen  
  
Chaser- carter Andrews  
  
Chaser- Julie love  
  
Chaser josh Gallagher  
  
Keeper-Morgan tarnish  
  
Ravenclaw  
  
Seeker- Fiona ragid  
  
Beater- lyndzy alwan  
  
Beater- Stanton drew - prefect  
  
Chaser- karyl Cleveland  
  
Chaser- Daniel stark  
  
Chaser- hunter remal  
  
Keeper- riley smith - captain  
  
Hufflepuff  
  
Seeker- Nikkei little  
  
Beater- Kelsey gram  
  
Beater- avril lucus  
  
Chaser- Frodo crutty  
  
Chaser- timothy lampert - captain  
  
Chaser- Kaila cue  
  
Keeper- Jessie Santana -prefect  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Okay there you go, and oh yeah, Hermione will be subbing on a position for one of the teams, if your not stupid you know which one. And also some where toward the middle of this story she will find out who her real parents are, I'll give you a hint as to whom.  
  
They both went to Hogwarts  
  
The father was in slytherin  
  
The mother was in Gryffindor  
  
The mom plays a big role in her life before and after death  
  
They both went when lily and James did  
  
The father is in the books  
  
Okay if you can figure out whom the father is I will give you a role as one of the quidditch team players from the visiting teams later in the year. Just put in your review your guess and which position and team you would want to be on.  
  
~~~  
  
  
  
Music-  
  
Black lap- keeps myself awake  
  
Guided by voices- teenage FBI  
  
  
  
~~~~~  
  
  
  
Authors' notes to reviewers-  
  
Justine- thanks for the review and I'm one too and am trying to stop, and once the get farther into the year it slows down don't worry  
  
Amber- thanks, and I will  
  
Xtremegirl- thanks and your on the list  
  
Kkdt- thank you 


	4. everyone knows

disclaimer- me no own, but i wish i owned draco (smirks)  
  
  
  
Contest-the contest is still going until I tell you who the dad is or I run out of quidditich spots which ever comes first.  
  
chapter 4- everyone knows  
  
  
  
Hermione woke the next morning to her alarm clock playing the Sundays wild horses. She sat up and yawned, her cat jumping up onto her lap, purring when she pet him.  
  
She hopped out of bed and got showered and dressed for the day. Today's outfit was a red and black plaid skirt that came down just a few inches before her knees, a black no sleeved shirt that had a red eagle across the chest, arm warmers and to complete the outfit, black knee high lace up boots. she walked over to her mirror and put on her make up black as usual and charmed her hair so that it was completely in braids.  
  
She looked at her clock, an hour till breakfast started. She grabbed her books and went to sit in the common room. when she got there she saw draco sitting on the couch reading the same knife magazine again.  
  
"Hey" they both said at the same time and hermione let out a small laugh.  
  
"i was bored last night and i found a few knifes that i thought you would like that you can afford" he said  
  
"Which ones" she asked sitting down next to him on the couch?  
  
"this..." he was cut off  
  
"hermione, there's a guy out in the hall who wants to talk to you" Stanton siad  
  
"Okay. Um show me them later okay" she said to draco before grabbing her bag and heading out the door.  
  
The person that was standing out there was Jason and he was staring at the ceiling shifting form one foot to the other.  
  
"hey" she said  
  
"Hey" he said "um, I wanted to talk to you, do wanna go for a walk outside."  
  
"sure"  
  
He took her bag and held it for her as they walked out side to a semi secluded bench in the court yard.  
  
"So I was wondering if um maybe you would like to well um, get a drink with me on the next trip to hogsmede" he asked avoiding eyes contact.  
  
"are you asking me on a date" she smiled  
  
"Well, yeah" he said looking up at her finally making eye contact.  
  
"okay, sure, it will be fun" she giggled  
  
"great, um you can sit with Jamie, Cassie, and me in our cart on the ride there." he smiled  
  
"Okay, that's great, but I got to get going, its almost breakfast, I'll see you later" she said and got up and left.  
  
She walked to the great hall, getting there slowly because she was off in lala land thinking and bumped into a couple things and people. When she finally got there Ron and Harry were already there eating and talking.  
  
"hey what are you two talking about, wait no let me guess...quidditich" she said  
  
the two boys nodded  
  
"They moved the first game up to the Friday before the first hogsmede weekend" Harry said.  
  
"EPP, that's next Friday, better get practicing" she said taking a bite of an apple.  
  
"we know" Ron said finishing his last piece of bacon "were going to practice after lunch, which reminds me Harry we need a new beater"  
  
"Yeah I know, how about scarlet feferman, she may be tiny but she has a good arm and is wicked fast." Harry suggested  
  
"i could do it" hermione said  
  
Both boys stopped talking and looked at her for a few seconds before busting into laughter.  
  
"what" she said  
  
"hermie you hate flying" Ron laughed  
  
"not trying to be rude, but you would fall on your ass, scarlet is much better" Harry said  
  
"Look there she is now" Ron said and he and Harry got up and went to talk to her. Hermione her the black haired girl say yes and they went off to get her, her new robes.  
  
"it was rude" hermione whispered to herself a frown playing on her lips.  
  
She got up and grabbed her bag and walked out of the great hall fast headed towards the girls bathroom. She got there and walked into a stall, slamming the door shut and leaning on it scaring a few first years in the process.  
  
She took her knife out of her pocket and slid it across her leg towards the mid part of her thigh. She banged her head on the door behind her and let out a muffled scream of frustration.  
  
She slowly calmed down and snapped her knife shut replacing it in her pocket where it had been not bothering to wipe the blood off. She dapped the blood of her leg and grabbed her bag before walking out of the bathroom towards potions. she was not going to let this keep her down.  
  
She held her head high as she walked more of a strut then usual down the hall. Guys all along to corridor turned there heads as she walked by.  
  
Her boots clicked on the floor as she walked and her roes billowed behind her. A few guys who were staring at her had girlfriends who were standing with them at the moment, and hermione could have sworn she heard a few slaps, she let out a small giggle.  
  
She walked to the dungeon and was about ten minutes early so she decided to just wait outside till it was time, no one else was there anyway, so she thought, until she heard the last sentence of a conversation between professor Snape and Dumbledore, she listened closely.  
  
"Well, I'll give you something to think about, if you don't tell her soon serveus I will no chose but to tell her myself" the older professor said.  
  
She heard him walking to the door and backed away from it just in time, professor Dumbledore walked out and saw her.  
  
"hello miss granger" he said  
  
"hello professor" she said  
  
"Well, you will have to excuse me I have a person, um well I have something to check on." He said and walked away.  
  
Professor Snape walked out next and looked at her suspisosly.  
  
"how much of that did you here" he growled  
  
"nothing sir" she lied "i just got arrived, i was wondering if i could work on my potion"  
  
"fine, out of the three you will be doing the truth potion, Ms. granger. i would really love to see what you have in your head" he said  
  
"But that's not fair, I should get to chose" she protested.  
  
"To bad, now get to work" he said and as other students started to arrive he gave them there assignments as well, although hermione could not help but notice he let malfoy chose which one he wanted to do.  
  
"i hate them" Herman groaned as she added essence of slug to her potion "this is going to taste nasty." she said to herself  
  
A half hour into class, he told everyone to take a sip of there potion. Snape had given almost all the gryffindor a truth potion and none of them were happy about it, it ended up turning out that every person made there potion right, even Neville (got to cut the boy a little slack). then Snape wanted to make sure and one of his test subjects was Hermione.  
  
"Ms. granger, how about you." he said "what is something you just learned about your life"  
  
"noth.. I'm adopted" she said against her will  
  
"so your not a mudblood" he said getting snickers from the slytherins and glares from the gryffindors  
  
"No, I'm not" she glared.  
  
"how do you know" he asked sounding a bit interested  
  
"i just do" she said  
  
"how much do you hate this class at the moment"  
  
"its not this class i hate, its you, you are always favoring your stupid house when half of them have the same IQ of a muggle rock. you hate my house for no reason at all and it makes me extremely angry okay" she burst  
  
Just then the bell rang and everyone got up to leave.  
  
"Ms. granger you stay" Snape said and she just sat back down in her seat. he walked over to her "you have in no way the right to talk back to a teacher that way" he said "and as i have told you before, it is none of your business why i dislike your house" he said "now leave and 10 points taken from gryffindor"  
  
she got up and walked to the door but before she left she told him something  
  
"Its your fault that I said those things, and I will find out why you hate us I promise you that" she said and turned to leave slamming the door behind her.  
  
Hermione was so mad that as she was walking down the hall she didn't notice anyone and bumped into ginny, there books went flying to the ground.  
  
"Good one granger" malfoy laughed as he and a few friends walked by.  
  
Hermione glared up at him as she picked up her stuff.  
  
"I'm sorry ginny" she said a little ruder then expected, still angry at Snape and what Harry and Ron had said earlier.  
  
"shish, Mione, what's your dilemma" ginny asked  
  
"Snape and ahh stuff" she growled "ahh thank the goddess this stupid truth potion is wearing off"  
  
"truth potion" ginny questioned  
  
"for potions class, now thanks to Snape half the school probably knows that i was adopted, considering how fast gossip travels around here" she sighed  
  
"your adopted" ginny asked "when did you find out"  
  
"Right before I left for school, look ginny I really don't want to talk about it, and I really have to go anyway okay" hermione said and walked past the young red head to the library to do research for arimithacy.  
  
While in the library someone slammed down a book in front of her.  
  
"Leave me alone" she growled not even looking up she already knew he it was.  
  
"Why I thought we were friends granger" the voice said.  
  
"we were never friends malfoy" she said looking up to see the seven members of the slytherin quidditich team standing there  
  
"aw, I'm wounded, see you round granger" he said walking off the team following  
  
Cassie was the last in the group and turned around mouthing the words 'sorry' to her as she went by. Hermione mouthed back that it was okay.  
  
"well that was pointless" she said  
  
She went back to her studying and after two hours or so it was time for munch, so she got up put her books away and walked to the great hall. She sat at the far end of the table no where near anyone else, she was still mad at Harry and Ron.  
  
She ate a plum and some juice, and began to notice how she never ate anything anymore, again she didn't care.  
  
She left about ten minutes after she had arrived at the great hall she left walking back to her room. She grabbed her broom and walk back out and to the really rocky high side of the island which the school was on and looked down it was a 200 foot drop at the least. she had deiced she need a rush and this was just it.  
  
She jumped.  
  
200 feet  
  
150 feet  
  
100 feet  
  
70 feet  
  
30 feet  
  
She down fast her firebolt clasped tightly in her right hand. When she had reached about 20 feet she swung the broom around and flew back up to the top of the cliff.  
  
When her feet touched the ground again she let out a breath she hadn't realized she was holding. She smiled, she liked the rush.  
  
She walked back to her room slowly letting the world slowly except her for who she was. Once she finally got back to her room she looked at her clock it was already time to go to transfiguration class.  
  
Class went as usual as did muggle studies and herbology, it wasn't till charms that hermione wasn't bored. They were working on using there wands to change there clothes, hermione of course got it on the first try. Neville on the other hand didn't, he accidentally made his clothes disappear and everyone saw him in his full naked glory till the professor charmed his clothes back on, and he was left blushing floresently.  
  
Hermione couldn't help but think that he had a good package, she smirked at her own thought.  
  
once that class was over it was time for dinner. she walked to her room and put her stuff away then continued to the great hall. when she arrived there she noticed people whispering and points as she walked by, and she thought she heard a slytherin girl say 'they probably didn't love her' as she walked by. she just rolled her eyes and sat down next to Harry. she was still a bit angry at them for the comment they mad earlier but it really didn't matter.  
  
Both boys looked up at her weirdly but went back to eating sneaking glances here and there.  
  
"okay say something, i know you want too, i know you know i was adopted. who wouldn't at the rate gossip moves around here" she said  
  
"it doesn't change anything, your still the hermione we know and love, it just hurts a little that you didn't tell us when you found out" ron said  
  
"Yeah Moines' your our best friend we'll always love you no matter what" Harry said putting an arm around her shoulders, she leaned on his shoulder for a minute before they both pulled away.  
  
"I don't know I just wanted to figure out who my birth parents are first, why they gave me up. I just well, I don't know, I just want to know" she sighed and took a bit of a roll.  
  
"Hermione you barely eat anymore, eat something" Harry said.  
  
"I'm not hungry" she said "look um I have studying to do, I'll see you guys tomorrow" she said and got up and left without a good bye.  
  
Hermione walked back to her room and just stood there for a minute thinking, finally deciding to just study. She grabbed her charms book and walked into the common room to see draco leaning over the table measuring his transfiguration assiment.  
  
"hey" she said sitting down  
  
"hi" he said not looking up "sorry bout earlier gotta act usual you know"  
  
"I know" she said opening her book and starting to read.  
  
"Hey, I never got to show you those knives" he said and took the magazine from his bag holding it up.  
  
"Sure" she said and closed her book, then walked over and sat next to him.  
  
"Okay, I thought you might like that one" he said pointing to one that had an Indian tribal band on it.  
  
she laughed "i already have that one" she said  
  
"Why" he asked suspiciously.  
  
"oh my step dad, bought it for me to protest my self" she lied  
  
She looked down at the paper.  
  
"Of the ones I can afford I like that one" she pointed to the one with a shooting star on the handle.  
  
"This one" he said pointing to a different one.  
  
"No, this one" she said pulling his hand back to the one with the star on it rolling her eyes.  
  
"This one" he pointed to another.  
  
"No, this one" she pulled his hand back again. She held it there not even noticing, that there fingers were intwined. when she did notice she blushed slightly untwining them.  
  
"sorry" she said and put her hands in her lap looking down at them.  
  
"its okay" he said  
  
She looked up "so um..." she was at a lose for words.  
  
They both looked at each other and without realizing it leaned in and kissed the other softly. Hermione hands went slowly up to his neck playing the hair on the back or his head.  
  
Draco dropped the book and put his hands on her waist and leaned her back on the couch so that he was on top her, one leg between hers. One of his hands traveled up to her neck caressing the skin there.  
  
Draco slid his tongue over her bottom lop silently asking to enter and she obliged unknowingly. He slid his hand up her shirt a little and that's what snapped her back to reality.  
  
Hermione relized what she was doing and pushed draco off her fast and got up.  
  
"what the hell, why did you kiss me malfoy" she yelled, her voice like venom  
  
"It takes to people to kiss granger" he said getting up from his spot on the floor where he had been knocked to and standing in front of her.  
  
"What ever" she said turning her head away from him and crossing her arms over her chest.  
  
"You know you liked it" he said and went and put his hand softly on the side of her neck, sliding his thump over the soft skin there.  
  
She turned her head and slapped him.  
  
"Don't touch me ever again, malfoy got it" she yelled, turning, grabbing her books and retreating to her room.  
  
She slammed her door and threw the book at the wall pages went flying everywhere. She threw anything she could pick up against a wall until she calmer herself down, then magically fixed it all.  
  
she pulled out her journal and wrote in it a long entry.  
  
~~~why did he kiss me, i liked the kiss though, it was so soft yet so fierce at the same time, why the hell am i thinking, he is the enemy~~~  
  
Hermione put the journal in her bed side table and got up putting on her pajamas. She left the braids in, they would help for her hair style tomorrow.  
  
She went to her stereo and found a mix CD of soft music and put it on turning the volume to low, she stepped to her dresser blowing out her candles, then crawled into her bed.  
  
She pulled her heavy scarlet conferter over her body and drifted off to a dreamless sleep, her music playing softly in the background.  
  
...But I'm sleeping I'm so deep in  
  
so much more real to me closer then reality  
  
it's always cold always day always here  
  
always say I'm all right I'll be okay...  
  
  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
authors notes-  
  
Song-black lab-keep myself awake.  
  
~~~~~  
  
authors notes to reviews-  
  
Update-if you want and update email sent to you when I put a next chapter up just tell me in your review I will be glad to do it.  
  
  
  
Stephanie malfoy-yeah I always forget how to spell that name even though its easy, and thetas my first name too.  
  
Xtremegirl-welcome and you got the dad right, next time you review tell me what position and house you want to be in along with your name.  
  
Sweet sorrow-you go the dad right but I am not going to tell you which. In your next review tell me which team and position you would want to be one, and I may be able to arrange you and Harry, maybe.  
  
Demon blade-you got the father right, like everyone else who has so far, in your next review tell me the team and position you want to be on and I need your name.  
  
Totowizofoz-thanks for the review, but sorry you got the father wrong, you can guess again though I don't mind. 


	5. memorys

Disclaimer- me no own, only wish.  
Chapter 5-memorys  
  
Hermione woke up this morning to something jumping on her stomach.  
  
"Oomph" she groaned and grabbed what was bouncing on her stomach.  
  
During 5th year Hermione had told winky that if she wanted, she would be the house elves master, when she was at school. She still believed in S.P.E.W, but it made winky happy to have a master.  
  
"Master Hermione, wake up, I bring apples" winky said  
  
"I'm up, good morning winky" Hermione said rubbing her eyes and almost knocking over the bowl of apples beside her.  
  
"Good morning master" winky said giving Hermione a hug  
  
"Okay, why don't you go back to the kitchen I need to get ready for school"  
  
"Okay" with that the house elf disappeared with a poof  
  
Hermione looked at the clock two hours till breakfast. She sighed, she was glad it was Friday.  
  
She sat there eating her apples and once she had eaten about half of them she got up and showered. She undid her braids by hand, after she had dried them and gotten out of the shower. Before she had taken them out thought she but a curling charm on them. Now she was looking into the mirror and had a head full of really tight curls. She stepped out of the bathroom and stretched before proceeding to her room.  
  
She closed the door behind her and went to look in her closet. She finally decieded on a black skirt, black knee high boots, a red top with black vines all over it and red arm warmers.  
  
"Look-in good" her mirror said and winked at her. She laughed  
  
"I know" she said "hmm, let's see today I have potions, charms and free classes, sweet" she said to herself.  
  
She grabbed her potions stuff and her charms book, her wand and back pack. She walked over and gave her cat a pet on the head and then walked out her door, locking it behind her.  
  
As she walked out she noticed Draco was not in the common room like he usual was, she just shrugged it off.  
  
She walked through the portrait whole and looked at her watch, which said it was and hour till breakfast, so she decided to go for a walk outside. As she neared the door by the quidditch field she put down her bag down and then walked out, where she saw the slytherin quidditch team out for an early practice.  
  
She had nothing better to do so she sat down on a near by bench and began to watch them practice.  
  
Jason hit a bludger and it almost grazed Draco's head as he went into a nose dive to catch the snitch. Once he caught it he flew back up to the group. They put the balls away and she was them fly to the ground and walk into the locker room.  
  
As they did this and idea popped into her head and she ran over and his behind a tree hear the entrance to the locker room. As they walked out she was glad to see that Jason was at the end. She grabbed his arm and pulled him behind the tree and pinned him to it, making him drop his broom.  
  
"Hey" she said  
  
"Hey" he said "why did you do that"  
  
"Wanted to say hey" she said "well that and I was bored out of my mind"  
  
"Hmm, well that's good to know, but I have to go get a shower, can I have a kiss before I leave."  
  
She nodded and stood on her tippy toes and kissed him softly on the lips, but when she went to pull away he put an arm around her waist and pulled her closer and back into the kiss. She put her arms around his neck melting into his embrace. He slid his tongue over her bottom lip entering her mouth and deepening the kiss.  
  
After a few minutes Hermione reluctantly pulled away.  
  
"We should go" she whispered, her eyes still closed and her head resting on his chest.  
  
"Yeah, unfortuanlty. So until next weekend" he said looking down at her. He pulled her into another soft kiss.  
  
They pulled away again and said there good byes, each walking in a different direction.  
  
Hermione got the entrance and picked up her bag. She looked at her watch 5 minutes till breakfast. She could not believe she had been out there that long, kissing a boy no less.  
  
She started walking but stopped dead in her tracks, scared; in front of her was a big brown snake. She let out a small scream and jumped backwards.  
  
Blaise and pansy walked out from behind a corner laughing.  
  
"Works every time pansy" Blaise said "did we scare the wittle gwinffindor" she said in a baby voice.  
  
Pansy leaned down and picked up her snake "good jasper" she said placing him around her neck.  
  
"I hate being humiliated" Hermione growled  
  
"Well you just were and we're gonna tell everyone" Blaise grinned  
  
"go fuck malfoy" Hermione said and walked straight through the two girls knocking them flat on there asses "oops" she said not turning around.  
  
"Bitch" pansy said.  
  
"Heard that" Hermione yelled over her shoulder.  
  
Hermione walked into the great hall ignoring everyone whispering and pointing at her. The gossip about her being adopted was not going to stop anytime soon  
  
'Wonder why they gave her up'  
  
'Wonder if her birth parents are dead'  
  
'I'm telling you her parents probably didn't love her'  
  
These were things she heard as she walked to the Gryffindor table in the hall and sat down. She put her head in her hands and let out a muffled scream. That got her friends attention.  
  
"What's, wrong" lavender and Ron asked together, and then giggled at each other. Ron put his arm around his girlfriends' shoulders and she leaned her head on him.  
  
"It's just all the gossip going on and two stupid snakes trying to scare me" she said  
  
"Just, ignore them" Harry said rubbing her back in a friendly manner.  
  
"I try" she said leaning her head on his shoulder "you're a good friend Harry"  
  
"Hey, what about me" Ron said  
  
"You're a good friend to Ron" she laughed "so did you here there's going to be a Halloween dance this year"  
  
"Yeah I heard, wonder who I'll go with" Pavati said eyeing Harry, who blushed a little  
  
Harry pulled his arm off of Hermione and picked up a piece of toast. Hermione, who was surprisingly hungry, after she had ate all those apples later, scooped a couple spoonfuls of fruit salad on to her plate.  
  
"Ron look it's a miracle, she's eating" Harry said  
  
"Shut up Harry" she said before putting a banana piece in her mouth and slapping Harry playfully on his arm.  
  
"Ouch" he said rubbing his arm and smiling.  
  
She grinned at him.  
  
"So where to first today." Harry asked  
  
"Charms with Hufflepuff then double potions with slytherin again, I hate snape with a passion" Hermione groaned.  
  
"I think most of us do" Ginny added  
  
The bell rang  
  
"Time for class" mione said standing up and grabbing her bag. "You coming"  
  
"Yeah, yeah" the two boys whined getting up and the three of them walked out of the great hall.  
  
"So mione where have you been lately feels like we never get to see you" Ron asked.  
  
"Places, being in the library, and I have my own common room now too" she said "why do you ask"  
  
"Just wondering is all" Ron said  
  
They walked onto charms class and took there seats, Hermione sitting between to two boys.  
  
"Today we will be reviewing spells you have learned in you earlier years" the professor said  
  
After that first sentence Hermione tuned out and began to think about last June and her friend Artemis.  
  
::flash back::  
Artemis and Hermione on the phone.  
  
"I just can't stand to be here anymore" Artemis said  
  
"Artemis I know things have been going down hill for you for awhile now, they are for me too, but just because Brandon broke up with you does not mean you need to go this way" Hermione insisted.  
  
"Its so late Hermione, I'm almost dead. But I.. I need to tell you something, I know you're a witch, I am too my whole family is, if you ever need someone to talk to just say the right spell and I will be there for you" the girl faintly said.  
  
"No, Artemis, you can't leave me here alone"  
  
"I have too; just promise me that you will never hurt your self over a guy okay."  
  
"Artemis, but." she was cut off.  
  
"Promise me"  
  
"I promise but."  
  
"Good bye"  
  
"Artemis no" she yelled into the phone as it went dead.  
  
Hermione fell to the ground in a heap of tears, knowing what her friend had just done.  
  
Two hours later they found they found Artemis dead, she had slit her wrist.  
  
From that day forth Hermione vowed to herself to never break her promise to her lost friends and to never let herself cry again.  
:: end flash back::  
  
"Mione, mione you there" Harry said tapping her on the shoulder.  
  
She jumped with a little yelp.  
  
"Huh what" she said.  
  
"Where have you been class is over" Ron said gathering his stuff  
  
"Oh think is all sorry" she said standing  
  
"You okay" Ron asked.  
  
"Yeah, fine"  
  
"Sure you look kind of upset and it's not like you to zone out on a lesson like that"  
  
"Yeah I'm fine"  
  
"Okay um guys, were gonna be late for potions" Harry interrupted.  
  
"Epp, come on" she said and ran out of the charms room to the dungeons, her two friends following close behind.  
  
The three of them rushed into the room and into there seats just moments before the bell rang. They all sighed in relief.  
  
"Today we will be doing to potions" snape began "one to show a hidden ability and the other to show a hidden talent, we will begin with the talent first."  
  
Everyone began to move around and gather the necessary ingredients for the potion. That's when Hermione go there idea on how to get back at Blaise and pansy.  
  
Hermione got up and walked to the supply capanet to get her ware wolf hair she needed, but she also grabbed a little vile of aloe and as she walked back to her seat she poured it into the two girls cauldron.  
  
If she were right about adding the aloe, whish she knew she was, then the two snakes were gonna be having a very bad hair day.  
  
Around 30 minutes into class Hermione and the majority of the class were done the first potion and were told to taste it to make sure they did it right.  
  
Just as Hermione put hers in her mouth there was a big bang and everyone turned to Neville. But it wasn't Neville, Blaise and pansy, were sprawled out on the floor.  
  
Hermione burst into laughter, blaises hair was standing straight up and was red, and pansy's was purple and spiked. It took Hermione a few moments to calm herself down.  
  
The two girls began to argue with snape to take what ever happened away. To there surprise, right before being told to sit down, they were told it had to ware off on its own and it would take a few weeks. They were not happy.  
  
Snape began to go around the room finding what everyone's talent was. Most who went first already knew that they could do those things. Neville had summoned a guitar and was really good at that and the same went for Jason and the drums. When it got to Hermione nothing happened. But as she went to open her mouth to say something she began to sing  
  
I ripped up the picture  
  
The one in my kitchen  
  
I looked weak my eyes gave it all away  
  
I don't deny it  
  
I still haven't found it  
  
I proudly wear the scars.  
  
I've challenged every crutch so far.  
"Very good the majority of you got this potion right" snape said looking at the two girls trying to fix there hair "now start your hidden ability potion"  
  
Hermione Harry and Ron worked together adding ingredients to the concoction They started to here bangs from other people, and thought that they had screwed it up, but when they added powdered unicore horn, they got a bang to , evedntly it was suppose to do that.  
  
Again they took the potion everyone getting it right. They found out a few good things, Harry of course could speak parcel tongue but apparently so could Draco. Ron could move chess pieces with his mind, but only chess pieces. Hermione got a laugh out of that. Most peoples abilities you could spell your self to do. But what Hermione could do nearly scare her to death.  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Cliffhanger  
  
~~~~~~~ Extra bonus- a blooper  
  
The poly juice potions scene in the second movie.  
  
"I think I'm gonna be sick" Ron said moments before running into a bathroom stale.  
  
Harry downed the rest of his poly juice potion and leaned on the sink looking in the mirror.  
  
Slowly he began to turn into.............. professor McGonagall.  
  
"Ahh" a scream escaped his lips.  
  
"Cut, cut, cut" the director yelled "who switched the hairs"  
  
Professor Dumbledore walks up grinning shyly "I did"  
  
The director sighed "get Harry potters stunt man"  
  
"I feel so naked with out my winky" Harry cried.  
  
The end.  
  
~~~~~~~~~  
Authors' notes-  
  
Music- furslide- over my head  
  
If you want more bloopers just tell me  
  
um the contest is still going, to guess who the father is, you don't have to guess the mom cause she belongs to me I made her up okay, she is not in the books.  
~~~~~~~~~  
  
Authors notes to reviewers-  
Totowizofoz- yes you are right and you can have that position  
  
Anna- I am and don't worry there's a lot more to come.  
  
Justin ente- sorry but you got both parents wrong, but you're free to guess again. Yes it is from the Buffy album it is on of my top three cds that never leave my cd player. I am not gonna cheese it up by having her related to any of them so don't worry about that. And ahh what's a beta reader.  
  
Cheese- no its not to late to guess and yes you did guess write, next time you review just tell me your name and which house and position you want to be in.  
  
Demonblade- you are in slytherin, and I like that potion too.  
  
Xtremegirl- you got that position, and no the only way I keep mine covered is with my clothes sry, but you could try counselors, I dotn like to use that stuff.  
  
Angelstarling- thanks for the review. You got the father right, so next time you review just tell me your name and which house and position you want to be in. yeah I have only been going to hot topic for a little while but mine is a bit Goth, but I can mix there clothes with other stuff to make it look Goth I am good at that. Yeha I am prepared if people don't like that she cuts herself, I ant to know what they think, even if it's negative. And I will write more promise. 


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